Most of us don’t need a special day to be a good neighbor. But there is one. It’s called “Good Neighbor Day,” and Las Vegas HOA management company Soleil Association Management is celebrating it on September 28.
Being a good neighbor to those who are friendly and nice to us is easy, but how do we treat neighbors who are not so nice? Neighbors who are not friendly? Neighbors who seem to complain about everything in the community? How do we react to those neighbors who are downright rude and confrontational?
First of all, realize that not everyone in the community – even in Soleil Association Management’s Las Vegas HOA communities – wants to be friendly. They have the right to be left alone. That doesn’t mean you can’t continue to say hello, wave and give them a friendly smile. Just don’t press them for a response. Hopefully, after a period of time, they will come around and at least be friendly in return.
On the other hand, dealing with neighbors who are rude and discourteous requires self-restraint, diplomacy, and a well thought out plan for future confrontations rather than reacting out of anger and frustration in the moment. WikiHow.com and powerofpositivity.com share some insights about dealing with difficult people. We at Soleil Association Management, the premier Las Vegas community association management company, wholeheartedly agree!
- Take a deep breath (or several) and remain calm. While this may be easier said than done, stopping and taking a deep breath (instead of immediately responding in anger) allows you to calm down and take control of your emotions. Think about and weigh your options before you speak out of anger and frustration.
- Respond as politely as possible. It is natural to become defensive when someone attacks you, but rudeness begets more rudeness.
- Don’t blame yourself. It is common for some people to feel that they are responsible for difficult situations, that they could have done something to prevent the situation. Typically, that is not the case. Realize that the other person must assume responsibility for their own behavior.
- Use “I” statements as much as possible to soften angry rhetoric. “You” statements sometimes feed a tense situation. “I would like to hear your reasons for doing this,” instead of “You always do this to me!”
- Practice compassion. Does your neighbor have personal problems that affect his/her demeanor? Without prying, ask some simple questions that could lead to a healthy conversation and possibly reveal any underlying problems. “How has your day been going?” “How’s the family?” “Is there anything I can do to help?”
- Extend forgiveness. Even if you have nothing to be sorry for, just the words “I am sorry” have a way of breaking the ice and extending compassion. You can always say, “I am sorry that we aren’t seeing eye to eye.” “I am sorry for the situation.” “How can we resolve this?” Being the first to say “I’m sorry” can often lead the way to a healthier relationship.
Get to know your neighbor!
At Soleil Association Management’s Las Vegas HOA communities, celebrating Good Neighbor Day is easy and enjoyable. We encourage residents of our Las Vegas homeowner association communities to invite their neighbors over for coffee, bake someone a cake, or simply have a satisfying conversation by the mailboxes. Nice begets nice.
For those neighbors who are stubbornly difficult, give them space while continuing to be friendly. Accept that they may never change. You’ve heard the phrase: “If you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours!” It’s a start.
Article courtesy of Community Interests, the magazine of the Nevada Chapter Community Associations Institute